FROM THE DEPTHS
The beast that thou sawest was, and is not;
and shall ascend out of the bottomless pit, and go into perdition:
and they that dwell on the earth shall wonder,
Captain's Log Stardate 3376.1:
Having received approval for our little delay, the Enterprise is back
for Altair Six and back in compliance with orders. Doctor
McCoy has declared
First Officer Spock to be fit for duty and, on board, all is well.
Jim thumbed off the cabin desk recorder and chuckled to
The exact words of the doctor's report had been, "pedantic,
hard-headed, supercilious, and insufferably fit for duty."
Jim had sent it back pointing out that the verbiage was not exactly
objective medical terminology, Bones had simply added the words, "in my
expert medical opinion." Some days it seemed those two would
the death of him.
Jim stretched his tired shoulders. The wound across his chest
pulled and prickled with the motion. Bones had declared it
a scratch, not even worthy of medical attention, but for some reason it
irritated worse than any of the other physical insults of the
day. Funny how something seemingly so innocuous could burn so
deeply. But by now he should know better than to try to
feelings based on appearances.
With that thought he toggled the intercom. "Mr. Spock, report
my quarters." He had put this off for the better part of a
already and Spock, of all people, would have deemed that illogical.
The door signal buzzed within a minute. "Come," Jim
He stood up and moved out from behind the desk. The raw wound
again pulled at his chest but he ignored it.
"First Officer reporting as ordered, Captain."
Spock indeed looked every bit of "insufferably fit for duty."
With his uniform neat, his face composed and not a hair out of place,
he showed no sign of his recent ordeal. In fact, he looked a
sight better than Jim felt himself.
Vulcans. What can you do? Jim took a deep breath
and jumped in. "Yes, Spock, I want a status report."
Spock responded primly, "We are 8.32 days out of Altair Six, running at
Jim cut him off. "Not on the Enterprise, Spock. I want a
report on your status."
Spock's voice changed noticeably, but he held his face
"The pon farr is resolving. My physiological status is close
baseline and I am functioning normally." He looked straight
point over Jim's left shoulder.
Jim moved away from the desk. His boots clicked the deck as he paced
the short width of the cabin and back. He stopped dead in
of Spock--inches from his face. Spock found he had no where
"Yes, so Doctor McCoy has informed me, but that isn't what I meant
either. You told me that you had a commitment on
assume that was T'Pring?"
"Yes," replied Spock warily.
"And now that commitment is dissolved?"
"Yes." Spock gathered the sum of his biological controls to
his voice modulated and utterly free from anything a human, this human,
would hear as stress.
Kirk gestured, his hands spread wide. "And so now you are
free to choose--free to choose whom you wish to be with."
"No. As you have learned, Captain, that is not the manner in
which Vulcan mates are chosen."
"But you are not Vulcan," Kirk argued. "You're as much human
you are Vulcan, and choosing with whom to spend ones life is almost
fundamental to the human spirit. How can you just turn your
on that?" Jim's face was flushed now and animated with
life. All evidence of fatigue had simply fallen away and he
no hint of backing away from this battle.
Spock sank into the chair. A human strategist would have
it a mistake to sit, to yield the psychological high ground.
such a thought did not occur to Spock. It simply appeared
this was to become--a long night.
"Captain--Jim, I have chosen to live a Vulcan way of life. So
much of what makes me an asset to the fleet, to this ship, to you,
comes from that pattern of thought and total reason. If I
disrupt that by giving reign to human sentiment, I would jeopardize
everything that I am--everything that you have in me."
Jim drew his tongue across his lower lip. "But your father--"
Spock cut him off abruptly. "My father has a number of
that I do not. Among the most important is that he is fully Vulcan in
all ways. He has the leeway of accepting an occasional
without compromising who he is.
"I, however, am not in a position to be able to afford such a luxury.
My human half already inconveniences me to a significant
I cannot give in to it further or I risk losing everything I have made
of myself, everything that is of value to you. Can you
Spock shook his head. "Then I am sorry for that. But my
is pragmatic only. It is not a reflection of any feelings I
have for you."
Jim heard the concession, in that choice of words, but he had other
fish to fry. "'It's not you, it's me'? That's pretty cliche
Vulcan, isn't it?" he observed sharply. "Can't you do any
"Jim, as with all decisions, this one comes with costs and
benefits. In my estimate, the latter outweigh the former."
Jim looked him straight in the eye. "Don't I get a say?"
Spock considered. "In a way, yes. The decision must
mine, yet you have more influence over me than you can possibly know.
"But consider this: if we do as you suggest, and if I were to become
unable to function as your First Officer, then what?"
Jim squared his shoulders and felt the burn across his chest
anew. "That's a lot of ifs, Spock. I
think you can do
anything you set your mind to. I think you can be anything
decide you want to be. You have the choice: human, Vulcan or both.
"Yes, I value the mental discipline that you have afforded as a Vulcan,
but ships run just fine with all sorts of races and species wearing the
braid. The vision of the Federation is not to exploit the
strengths of individual, but to combine all attributes of all
people--of all peoples--to see how much more we can become.
"I value you for who you are, not what you are, and I don't foresee the
Spock I know compromising anything just because--" Jim stopped and took
his unresisting hand. "Just because he has allowed himself to
fall in love."
Spock opened his mouth as if to say something, but to his surprise, no
words came forth. His mouth drained suddenly dry, mocking his efforts
at control. He swallowed and tried again, very
think that you underestimate yourself, Jim. You are a
Human skin temperature was 3.38 degrees Kelvin lower than Vulcan, and
yet Jim's hand seemed to burn hot around his. Finally,
mercifully, Jim let it drop. "So what will you do for your next
cycle? You can't just ignore biology."
"My family will make arrangements for a suitable mate."
"So you'll just marry someone you don't love? Spock, that's
insane!" Jim protested.
"It is not. You are making an highly ethnocentric judgment,
is beneath your position as a galactic explorer. It
is--biology. It is long-standing Vulcan sociological custom.
it is my decision."
Spock continued, "Nonetheless, it does not change the fact that my
heart belongs to another."
Spock stood before him, unmasked, but face as calm and still as Jim had
ever seen it. They stared at each other for a handful of heartbeats,
until at least one of them couldn't bear it any more. Spock
leaned back in the chair as Jim turned away and spoke to the mesh
"Spock, just so we are clear on this, you do know that I love you,
"And you know that if you change your mind, I'll be here?"
Jim clutched onto the cold metal mesh until the edge bit into his
palm. The sting helped him focus. He straightened
shoulders and took a breath and when he turned back to the chair he was
again his old cocky self with the swagger in his step and the challenge
in his voice.
"Okay, in that case you can go. Breakfast at 0600?"
Spock rose from the chair to parade rest. Whatever he had
anticipated, it wasn't being let off the hook this easily.
"See you then. Night, Spock." With a twinkle in his eye, Jim
him a little nod and Spock slipped quietly from the room.
Jim threw himself down on the bunk and absently fingered himself before
falling into a hard night's sleep.
Outside in the passageway Spock stood, one hand raised at the door
call, before finally turning again to go.
Captain's log Stardate 5966.2 :
The Enterprise is fifteen minutes away from arrival into Vulcan orbit,
having been approved for diversion there from our assignment on
the Romulan Neutral Zone. The plan is to be finished on Vulcan within
four hours and to be back at our patrol post within three
days. My request
for a discretionary diversion with no accompanying details has no doubt
raised a lot of eyebrows at HQ, but the border had been quiet recently.
With the exemplary record with which it appears that we are about to
close out our five-year mission, my command opinions now pull a lot of
The fact that there had been a reported sighting of a Romulan ship in
the vicinity of the Vulcan star system may have helped his case, but
still, Jim thought, taking a whole starship out of service for a week
for a friend's wedding might be pushing the envelope just a bit.
In a way this whole thing had taken him as much by surprise as it had
three years ago. He wasn't expecting it this soon.
planned on having a little more time to--well, he didn't know what for,
but he definitely thought he had a few more years. Bones said
might have something to do with Spock's abnormally aborted first cycle,
or possibly with his hybrid physiology. Either way it didn't
matter. Either way Spock was going home to be permanently
Apparently T'Pau had selected the woman, T'Enno, and Spock had formed
the preliminary link with her in a brief meeting during an academic
leave more than two years ago. When he had come back he
his personnel file with a number of new professional credentials, but
he had never mentioned a word about the engagement until three days ago.
Three days ago he had formally reported to the captain that he was in
pon farr. Given the ship's current assignment, he had
only leave time and a shuttlecraft, but had invited Jim and Dr. McCoy
as a matter of form.
With the nearly disastrous surprise that had awaited Spock the last
time still fresh in his mind, it had never even occurred to Jim to let
Spock go alone. If he had any other more personal reasons for
diverting a working starship and a crew of 421 to ensure that Spock
wouldn't stand in the marriage arena without him, he preferred not to
think about it. That matter had been settled long ago.
He pulled off his old shirt and put on a fresh one. Not that
would last long. According to the advance report, it was 44
degrees Centigrade in ShiKahr right now. Jim thanked his
stars at least it wasn't summer. He wasn't at all sure he
take the heat.
He hit the intercom. "Sickbay."
"Sickbay. McCoy here."
"We'll be there in ten minutes, Bones. You ready?"
"Pretty much. Just stocking my medkit."
"Medkit? What for?" Jim asked.
There was a long silence on the other end.
Jim screwed up his face. "Relax, Bones. Surely
go that wrong twice. Fifteen minutes in the transporter
room. Kirk out."
Jim unconsciously checked himself in the mirror before heading out the
door to Spock's quarters. There was no response to the call
button, so Jim simply let himself in.
At first he couldn't see a thing. He could only hear the
breathing. He signaled for the lights and saw Spock lying on
back on the bed, eyes open to the ceiling. Jim walked over
shook him by the shoulder. Before he knew what had happened,
Spock had grabbed his arm.
"Jim." Spock's eyes met his but wavered, glazed and
Spock's cheeks glowed unnaturally bright. His fingers bit
Jim's muscle with the unbreakable grip of a durasteel vice and pulled
his captain ineluctably down towards him on the bed.
"Spock," Jim kept his voice carefully neutral. "We're
At Vulcan. We are going to meet T'Enno, your wife."
"My wife," Spock repeated blankly.
"Yes," Jim pressed. He felt the hot swell of Spock's erection
pressing into his stomach and swallowed hard. Someone had to
control. He focused on the pain in his arm and took a
breath. He struggled to catch Spock's eyes. "Your
wife. We have to go--now."
Spock wrinkled his forehead in concentration and his face seemed to
clear just a little. His hand fell away to the bed and he
himself to his feet, swaying unsteadily at first.
"Thank you, Captain," he said formally.
Jim smiled just a smidgen. "Anytime." He reached
out as if
to usher Spock by the arm, but Spock shied away from the touch.
"After you, then," Jim said, and waved him out of the door.
They beamed down to the same millennia-old arena. Everything
appeared eerily the same as the last time they had arrived.
Doubtless it had been the same for hundreds, if not thousands of
years. A soft tinkle of bells was barely heard over the
Spock paced the clay restlessly.
Jim caught his attention and brought him back. "Spock, is it
really all right for us to be here--after that little charade we pulled
Spock looked off in the distance. "I predict no dissension
T'Pau. She is a most logical woman. While in her
position she is obligated to uphold the traditions that the planetary
council has elected to follow, she values all life most
While I have no personal knowledge of her opinions, I would venture to
surmise that she would not only fail to censure the doctor's actions,
but actually find them to be commendable."
Jim glanced at Bones who rocked on his toes. Jim said, "See,
Spock, even T'Pau agrees that sometimes breaking tradition--"
Suddenly there was a great crack and a bang from the rocks to the
right. Out of the corner of his eye, Jim caught just a
glimpse of silver and black shimmering on a patch of rock.
it disappeared, as the alien waves of heat made the rocks themselves
appear to shift and move in the glare of the harsh Vulcan sun.
"Romulans!" Kirk shouted and dashed up into the cliffs. Spock
peered hard but saw nothing but haze. Nonetheless, he took
close at Jim's heels. McCoy started after them, but in the
air made it only a few dozen yards before realizing he was doomed to be
left behind. Panting, he rested hands on his thighs and
his friends run.
Suddenly the ground gave way under Jim's foot. Caught in a
rockslide, he was swept off his feet and away in a river of
Spock lunged for him, missing him by inches and succeeding only in
getting carried away himself in the tonnes of rock now cascading down
"Spock!" Jim rolled toward him and strained an arm out to its
limit, but the flow only peeled them farther apart. Caught in
flow Spock was carried into a rocky crevasse and disappeared out of
sight; a flood of rock poured in on top of him. Jim looked
backwards in helpless dismay until the landslide carried him over a
cliff and into another pit himself
When the slide finally stopped, Spock found himself buried deep in the
bowels of his planet. He was unable to estimate how far he
fallen; he had lost track at 852 meters. He blinked and
for his eyes to accommodate, but after a time he accepted that they
would not for he was in the true absence of light.
It was also totally silent. No water dripped. No
crawled. No wind blew at all. The only sounds were
strumming of his own pulse, harsh against his ears and the rasping of
his own breath. They seemed strange and coarse companions to
Although the air was fresh and cooler than on the surface, no more than
40 degrees Centigrade, perhaps, he could detect no movement at
all. He calculated the probability that the rockflow had
only because the passage to the surface was now sealed. The
of escape were not in his favor.
He tried the communicator. It failed to penetrate the planet's
crust. Tentatively he felt his immediate surroundings with
hands and, respectful of the ominous pain in his right ankle, he
attempted to stand.
He was correct. He leg was fractured, likely both the distal
tibia and fibula he surmised. He put his weight on his left
and just balanced with his toes of his the right.
The ceiling was high enough. He called out and, by the amount
sound dispersal, estimated a large volume to the cavern.
echoes came back to him as well, haunting, repeating from all
directions at once.
Spock reached back for his phaser. He put it on the lowest
setting and aimed in front of his feet. A small boulder began
glow brown, then plum, then red. The air temperature rose to
more comfortable level and the cavern took on an eerie monochromatic
The cavern was rough and jagged, at least two hundred meters
across. Rocks jutted and perched at all angles and the sides
sloped harsh and irregular up to the high ceiling. Large
sat at intervals as did huge slabs and sheets. The right side
filled with the debris of the landslide all the way from floor to
ceiling. Any egress through there was surely long
the peaks and shadows in the other areas were a mystery
They could easily conceal a passage and where there was a passage there
may well be a way out.
The floor, as it was, was strewn with rocky debris. In places
channels ran vertically like tubes. Spock called out again
surmised it was these pipes giving the eerie echoes to the room. He
tossed a pebble down a nearby tube. He listened for over a
minute, but never heard it land.
Spock took a tentative step towards the left and the rock slipped under
his foot. He caught himself, barely, and sat back down to
reconsider. With the debris and hidden channels underfoot,
movement would be treacherous at best. Even if he found a
passage, the improvised light was already fading. His phaser
would not last for long at his rate of progress. Assuming his
ankle was to tolerate it at all. Assuming there was anywhere
go that would still reach the surface.
But Doctor McCoy had witnessed the approximate site of their
disappearance. There would be a search and, with modern
techniques, the probability exceeded 94.9% that he would be
found. Unless he was beneath a deposit of achilillite, which
would block the bioscans entirely.
Spock concentrated on recalling the distribution pattern of achilillite
deposits on Vulcan, but the information eluded him. It seemed
that he should know that data, but try as he might, he could not recall
it now. And so then he simply sat on a boulder and watched
world view close in tighter and tighter as the last of the precious
light ebbed and dwindled and finally died completely as the little rock
at his feet went black.
What thoughts enter a man's mind when he is buried alive, alone in the
dark, waiting to live or to die? Some men might rue the
not taken, the opportunities forever lost. Some men might
at the unknown mysteries of the things that they would never see or
feel or know. Some men might bargain, might make a deal with
whatever powers that be that should they survive this, that they would
never know such emptiness again. Some men might be paralyzed, too
overwhelmed by the immensity to think anything at all. And
might just go quietly mad.
If Spock of Vulcan thought any of these things, that will never be
known. But under the cover of the darkness, in that vast
cavern where there would be no witness to his weakness, as the fever
burned high and hot within him, he buried his head deep in his hands.
One point three eight hours later there was again the rumble of gravel
and rock pouring in. Out of ingrained reflex, Spock looked
around, but of course he could see nothing at all. Absently,
wondered if this was to be his end, crushed under the press of debris,
but then a huge slab gave way and a shaft of sunlight broke through
high up near the ceiling.
The slab fell far to his right. Only a small belt of rock
through a tunnel high up on the right wall. Then
whoop and an excited cry Jim Kirk slid out on his ass.
"Spock!" He rolled off of the rock slide and down the wall,
coming to land rather ingloriously at Spock feet. He picked
himself up and grinned, "Miss me? Sorry it took so
There must be kilometers of passages in here."
He was a mess. He was covered, absolutely covered in dirt from head to
toe. His shirt was ripped in several places and his trousers
gashed so as to be beyond useless. His phaser and communicator had been
dropped somewhere in the chaos. There was a swollen, ugly
laceration on his forehead and bloody scratches all over his torso and
yet he grinned from ear to ear.
Spock blinked at him in undisguised dismay. "Captain, surely
were not moving through tunnels in the dark? I cannot
overemphasize the dangers involved in such a course of action. Aside
form the rock slides, there are sheer drop-offs, overhangs-- "
Jim rubbed his impressive goose-egg ruefully. "Yeah, I found
of them. But I got here, didn't I?" He flashed the
predictable cocky grin.
"Captain, the fact that you have managed to succeed does not alter the
fact that the action was recklessly inadvisable."
"Doesn't it, Spock?" said Jim, now deadly serious. "Are you
sure that outcomes aren't the only thing that do matter?"
Jim tilted his head and looked around the cavern. "But now,
got to get out of here. You have a pressing engagement, I
The single shaft of sunlight bore down almost exactly where Jim stood
and, after the long hours in the dark, Spock's eyes almost burned to
look upon him. Spock opened his mouth as if to
then they heard the growl.
Jim crouched and whirled, reflexively reaching back for his phaser that
was no longer there. His eyes searched the shadows.
what was that?"
Spock had drawn his phaser and he too scoured the edges of his vision.
"Unknown, however, 99.2% of planetary animals capable of emitting such
a sound, are also capable of mutilating or killing an adult Vulcanoid."
"Great." Jim straightened and looked up at the wall. Huge
boulders obscured the view. Anything up there would be in a
position of advantage.
Spock added, "It is also possible that it is not a creature, but simply
the wind moving through the tubes and chimney. The caverns
distort sound waves in an unusual manner."
Jim scratched his head dubiously. "If that was the wind, it
sounded hungry. Come on, if an animal can get in, then we can
out. Let's see how." Jim made as if to set out over
"Jim." Spock called him back. "I will not be able
travel. My leg is broken." Spock gestured calmly down at his
Jim rubbed his forehead smearing blood and grime even further, although
it made little difference now. "Okay, give me your
communicator. I'll try to make it up to signal
stuck out his palm.
Spock surrendered the communicator as ordered. He eyed the
chimney in the middle of the ceiling. The closest wall was
hundreds of meters of steeply inclined and grossly unstable debris.
"That would be highly imprudent, Captain. Our mishap was
witnessed and a rescue detail is no doubt underway."
Spock pressed the communicator into the sticky skin of Jim's
palm. As their wrists crossed, Spock felt the unacclimated
human's pulse racing dangerously fast just beneath the
Spock added, "The logical course of action would be to wait."
As if to punctuate the thought, a low growl rumbled through the air,
seemingly coming from everywhere at once. Jim spun.
Something flickered on the right and a small rock rolled down the
wall. Spock took aim and they waited, but all was quiet and
Jim cocked his head, decided. "Yes, but which one will find us
first? I'm not willing to take that chance." He
to the wall.
Spock called out after him. "Jim." He held the
Jim shrugged. "I'm out of hands, Spock." He
tattered pants, the utility clips long gone. "You keep
He winked and began to clamber up the wall as Spock watched with
feigned control. Another growl rumbled from somewhere and Jim
looked around once then continued climbing steadily. Spock
Jim in his sights, kept the phaser raised and ready for any enemy
About halfway up, Jim fell. Perhaps it was the roar that
him, but it sounded more like the roar came afterwards. Spock
leapt up, heedless of his broken leg, and stumbled to where Jim rolled
to the cavern floor.
Jim coughed and pulled himself to a painful sit as the dust settled
"Jim, are you all right?" Spock's voice was pitched just a fraction
higher than usual.
"Yeah, nothing hurt worse than my pride." Sweat poured off of
and his breathing was fast and deep in the hot, thin air. He shook his
head as if to clear it and struggled halfway to his feet.
Spock reached to reassure himself that the words were true. He touched
the clammy skin of Jim's chest to feel the heart thrill beneath his
fingertips, then pulled back in dismay. What was he
How far gone was his body that it would betray him in this
manner? His hands trembled and he laced them together to hold
each other still.
But Jim wasn't paying attention. He had turned his back and
his eyes around the rocks as the roar came again. It had a
sound like and echo in a wind tunnel. Jim hopped up and
around a corner. "Spock, what the hell *is* that?" he
Spock focused all his energy on the question. He closed his
to the man and thought only of the discipline. He was the
Officer. He had been asked for information. Think.
From the cool recesses of a mind almost buried under the flood of
primal need, the answer came almost to his surprise. "The
creature most likely to inhabit this area and emit such noises is one
that was known as the wy-dygu."
"Was known?" Jim snapped. "And what's that?"
Spock explained, "The wy-dygu was a carnivorous reptile with powerful
limb structure and sturdy claws that could tear prey to bits.
Although their jaw musculature was relatively weak, they produced a
potent poison in an oral sac and, like your Terran rattlesnake, could
opt to deliver a single dose through hollow fangs killing a victim
instantly. They were about the size and disposition of an
cougar, with a scaly silver hide and a black mane."
Jim started. "Yes, black and silver! That could've been what
I saw creating the disturbance on the rocks."
Spock inclined his head. "Possibly. That would be intriguing
however. For one thing, they lived almost exclusively
subterranean lives. But of even greater interest is the fact
they are a highly endangered species. In fact, up until now,
were believed to be extinct. Despite our current situation, I
hope to be able to leave this specimen for later study."
Jim stared at him incredulously. "You're kidding?"
Spock shifted his weight off of his injured leg. "Of course,
will protect you at all costs. In a choice between you and
animal, there is no choice. I merely state that there are qualities of
value in its life as well, particularly in such a rare specimen. I do
not understand its reappearance and I am reluctant to destroy that
which I do not understand."
"Spock, you just said that it's a killer."
"Its capacity for viciousness is not in doubt, Captain, only its
current motivation. Until we have more information, it would be a shame
to destroy such magnificence out of fear or ignorance."
Jim rolled his tongue. "What else do we need? That didn't
like a party invitation to me. And I don't see what other
could be after. As far as I could tell, these caves were lifeless."
Apparently moving on with his thoughts, Jim's gaze drifted to Spock's
ankle. "Come on, take a load off that thing--"
Jim swung his arm around Spock's back and tossed Spock's arm around his
neck. Spock felt his blood surge. His vision went
the world spun. He gave a high pitched cry in from the back
his throat and collapsed to the ground.
Jim's face loomed in front of him, calling his name as if from
afar. Jim's hand burned iron hot against his hip and Jim's
clad groin pushed in against his side. The sweaty masculine musk
assaulted his nose in wave after wave and he reached out blindly for
Jim's mind, but the link he sought was not there and he broke into a
sob of frustration.
"Spock!" Jim shook him in genuine alarm now. "Talk to
me! What is it? Spock!"
Spock gripped his own knees with his fingers and dug into them with all
his strength. With the pain as a new focal point his mind
to clear a little. "Captain, please remove your
Spock would never have recognized that strained voice as his own.
"NOW!" Spock roared.
Jim dropped his hands.
Minute by minute Spock's breathing returned to near normal.
Jim licked his lips. "It's the pon farr, isn't it?
It's bad," he surmised.
Spock opened his eyes and responded with forced candor. "It is
presenting difficulties, but I am not in immediate danger."
Jim met his eyes and said with perfect equanimity. "You have
to know that I won't let you die."
The growl echoed again--maybe farther away this time. Maybe not.
Spock said, "Captain, may I point out that we are trapped in a
waterless underground cave with a vicious carnivore and you are
proposing a sexual congress. While I am certain that Doctor
would have an amusing retort to your proposition, I myself find it
Jim would not be dissuaded. "I mean it. You said
pon farr was a mating drive. Mate or die. It
to be your bondmate, does it? And we both know that I won't
you, anyone, just die if I have any say in the matter."
Spock ignored the question. "The odds of our being rescued
the next six hours are," he floundered, "--excellent. I do
believe your suggestion will be necessary."
Jim pounced. "So I'm right! If necessary--"
Spock interrupted. "Yes. The hormonal cycle can be
by any copulation, however the insanity accompanying the pon farr makes
this highly inadvisable without a kal-i bond.
"However, as there should be several days remaining in my cycle, I
believe defense from the wy-dygu should be our prime concern until the
rescue party arrives. And I would be more comfortable with a
different topic of conversation." Spock's face was flushed
his voice cracked with effort, but he slowly peeled his hands from his
knees and laid them lightly on his lap.
"Baseball?" Jim offered hopefully.
Spock just raised an eyebrow.
They moved in and sat back to back, not quite touching, as daylight
turned to dusk overhead in their little window to the sky.
The heat was oppressive but the stillness even more so the hours
drifted by and they waited for something to happen.
It was Jim who finally broke the silence. "How can you do
it?" he asked.
"Marry someone you don't love. How can you do it?"
Spock responded easily, "And how can you copulate so readily with so
many you don't love?"
Jim drew himself up a little. "Well, Mister Spock, that's
different, that's just sex. We part and I go back to the life I want
with the people I really care for."
"It is not different at all. It is precisely the same idea
of a different culture and given a different label. This
is a design of Vulcan tradition calculated to meet the needs of Vulcan
society. Individual preferences are secondary to the greater
"And, I would ask, if place such value on this, why do you not seek out
a sex partner you truly desire?"
Jim grinned wistfully. Of course, seated back-to-back Spock
couldn't see it, but the tone was clear enough in his voice.
tried. He turned me down. I'm sure you remember.
"Spock, you know that this is wrong; even your body is telling you it's
wrong. You have already broke Vulcan custom in so many ways,
what's one more time? Why don't you seek out the partner you
Spock said, "As I am sure you remember, I told you there are dangers
inherent in what you catalyze within me. That has not
changed. Jim, I offer you my loyalty, my devotion, my life,
everything that I am except this one detail. Does it matter
very much?" Back-to-back, Jim could make nothing else out of
strictly regulated equilibrium of his voice.
Jim drew his arms around his knees and chucked softly as he lay his
head down on his knees. He would take Spock under any
circumstances whatsoever as the consummate friend and officer that he
was. But the waste. The great empty, aching,
of it all just sometimes seemed too much to believe. Jim said
gently, "I don't know. You tell me, my friend. You're the one
There was another growl and Jim leapt to his feet. The
was all but in darkness now. Jim almost glimpsed something
the corner of his eye. He whirled and fired. Rock slid to the
ground and all was silence.
"Do you see anything?" he asked Spock.
Jim rubbed his eyes. "Here you take the phaser. You
can see better in this light."
Spock demurred. "Inside of twenty minutes it will be dark and
neither of us will be able to see. My reflexes are down and
capacities are--uncertain. You should retain the weapon."
Jim shook his head and pressed it into his hand as he sank back to the
floor. "No, between the heat and the thin air, and the
surges, I've had it. I've got to take a nap." He
head back down on his knees.
Spock's eyebrows shot up.
"Captain, that is highly inadvisable."
"I trust you Spock. Just give me an hour or two," Jim yawned and was
asleep almost before the last syllable was out.
Spock watched his chest rise and fall as the last of the gray twilight
darkened ominously to the black of night.
It was then that the beast attacked. With a feral cry it
Jim's back digging fangs and claws into the soft flesh. Jim's
scream tore at a place in Spock's heart that he hadn't even known was
there. Oblivious of the danger, he wrapped himself around the
animal. He pressed and thrust against it with every ounce of
weight and applied every bit of his strength and might to wrest the
beast from his captain. The blood fever pounded hot and wild
his ears. The world spun. He couldn't
breathe. He had
only moments of consciousness left. He reached for the
neck where it intertwined with Jim's and squeezed with all he had
left. As consciousness faded he couldn't tell whether the hot
roar in his ears was the triumphant wy-dygu or the equally fatal hot
blood of his own pon farr.
Spock awoke to a clean white world. The domed ceiling vaulted
high overhead and joined seamlessly with smooth, curved walls unmarred
by any mark of window or door. He lay on a white bench in a
white sleeveless shift. His arms bore neither scratch nor
nor any other sign of his battle. He reached up and felt his
neck. It was equally unscathed. And more than that,
madness was utterly gone.
His inexplicably restored mind ran through the possibilities, pausing
on the various cultural mythical depictions of an afterlife. At the
moment, that seemed, logically, to be the top contender.
He reached out and poked a finger against a wall. The
was soft and smooth and pliant to the touch. It gave under
pressure maybe 2.73 centimeters. Spock wished absently for a
tricorder, if for no other reason than to present a certain physician
with an objective analysis of heaven at the time of his arrival.
He shifted as if to stand and felt the bench give with his
weight. Apparently it had been formed out of the same
substance. As he rose to stand, he felt something bang
his foot. Looking down he realized it was a force-cast, which
been applied to his ankle.
He pulled the shift up to study his body. The skin was
dark olive but the bones had been adequately set. There was a dusky hue
to the overlying skin suggesting that the bone had been knit while he
was unconscious. The force-cast was standard Federation
Spock revised his previous assessment. He doubted that a god
any culture would have need of a Federation medi-cast. He
his footing gingerly. The anticipated dysesthetic sensation
up his leg, but the cast held. He tried a step.
"Commander Spock. You will be interviewed by an intelligence
team. Please wait there." The voice came from
particular and spoke in Vulcan.
Spock spoke to the air. "Is Captain Kirk here and is he well?"
"Captain Kirk is in the Xenology wing making a satisfactory
recovery. Please wait for the intelligence team."
Spock resumed his seat and waited.
In a short period of time two Vulcans in matching robes materialized in
a transporter beam. They gave the customary salutation.
"Commander Spock, we are Investigators Sktam and Stipek from the
Planetary Health and Safety Assurity. We are here to take
statement as to the events of the seventh and eighth days of the month
Spock returned the greeting in kind and began to relate the tale.
When he was through, the two Vulcans regarded him coolly.
wy-dygu is thought to be extinct. There has been no confirmed
report of a live specimen for over seven hundred years," Sktam remarked.
"I am well aware of that. This does not change the fact that
events that I have reported did occur," Spock responded. "No
doubt, the Zoological Preservation Society will wish to investigate."
"It certainly bears investigation," Stipek agreed. "Pending
investigation, you will remain within the hospital grounds."
Spock raised an eyebrow. "If you doubt my word, you are free
to verify it."
Stipek reached for his thoughts.
The contact was light and clinical, as painless and efficient as an
ultraviolet probe. And when it was gone the memory was left
unruffled as it had never been disturbed at all.
Sktam said, "Your word is not in doubt. You will remain on
hospital grounds pending the results of the investigation.
is the order of the Assurity."
"I see," Spock responded. "In that case, may I see Captain
"That is permissible." One Vulcan touched an icon on his robe
and all three were taken in a golden transporter shimmer.
They rematerialized in a small anteroom. Through a small
pane he saw Kirk lying prone in the hospital bed with McCoy fussing
about something at his bedside. Spock hastened through the
doorway to join them.
"Spock!" McCoy spun around and grabbed him by the shoulders treating
him to a big lopsided grin. "It looks like you're okay after
But Jesus, it's harder to get a straight answer out of these people
than it is out of you."
"Most likely because you failed to ask the proper questions, Doctor. I
am quite all right." Although Spock's words were aimed at the doctor,
his eyes devoured Jim.
Jim lay apparently naked beneath the sheet. His upper back
bloody and torn with multiple parallel claw marks and bites.
sort of clear healing gel had been applied making the remaining skin
appear to glisten. Seeing Spock, Jim pushed himself up on his arms and
made as if to roll over, then winced painfully and collapsed, face
first, back on the bed.
"I thought you were told to stay down," McCoy remarked dryly.
Jim contented himself with twisting his face to the side.
"Spock." The voice was pure satisfaction. "I
thought I was
a goner--or that you were. The beast--when it attacked me--I
could actually sense its bloodlust for me at some primal, telepathic
level. It would stop at nothing to get to me. When you threw
yourself on the animal, I was afraid--"
"We," McCoy interrupted testily.
Jim corrected himself. "We were afraid that you had taken the
poison dose. Maybe even --for me, instead of me. Especially
no one would tell us what happened." He stared Spock hard in
eye, then looked him up and down. "But you seem to be
fine." Jim tilted his head as if awaiting confirmation.
Spock replied, "While I would certainly have taken any action necessary
to keep you from harm, I received no poison or injuries from the
wy-dygu. The species has not been studied in over seven
years. It is possible that the saliva has mutated as to be no
Jim studied him curiously. "Yes, but no injuries at all,
Spock? I remember; you were there, wrestling with
were wrapped around him, pulling him off of me. How can you
even have a single scratch?"
Spock checked again through the thin, white shift. His front
side seemed absolutely unbesmirched. "Unknown."
McCoy's face darkened, "What about that, Spock? I can't find
damn thing wrong with you. And shouldn't you be, you know, on
your honeymoon? Everything else seems to be back to normal
He scowled at his first set of readings and reset the mediscanner.
Spock replied, "When I awoke here, the madness was gone. I
presume it must have been dissolved by the combat, as occurred with the
previous cycle. I have given a full report to the health
authorities and the matter is being investigated. Although it
not a recognized phenomenon, it may have something to do with my hybrid
nature and the finding may be useful for future physiological studies."
"Hmmf." McCoy made a second pass with the scanner and,
satisfied with the results, stuck it back on his belt. "Well,
there is going to be a next time, please remind me to send my
regrets. I'm too old for this kind of excitement."
Jim wriggled up onto his elbows with a grimace. "What about
Spock? Now that this crisis is over, what about T'Enno?"
Spock responded so coolly that the other two were doubtless unaware
this was the first time she had entered his mind since his return to
consciousness. "She will be cognizant through our
bond that I am no longer in pon farr. Therefore she will be
that there is no need for the ritual. It will be
I will contact her formally as soon as circumstances allow."
Jim pierced his eyes meaningfully. "Just, deferred? Not
"Deferred until my next cycle." Spock clarified unnecessarily.
McCoy shifted uncomfortably and made as if to leave. "Uh, Jim
Jim flung out one arm and restrained him with a touch, but his eyes
never left Spock for an instant.
"Spock, you don't have to go through with that. In fact, I'd
rather that you didn't. These Vulcan weddings don't seem to be working
out well for me either. It might be time to try it another
way." Jim's eyes burned directly into Spock's.
"I believe I made myself quite clear in our recent
Nothing has occurred to change my position on that," Spock responded,
unconsciously averting his eyes. Despite the words, it didn't take a
psychologist to see that the captain won on some more primal, unspoken
"Exactly," Jim nodded. "I think our conversation was very
indeed. It certainly was to me. So why in the world
The two robed figures appeared through the doorway.
Spock, we require additional information; please come with us."
A red alert sounded in Jim's gut and he was moving up and off the bed,
regardless of the pain. "Now hold on just a minute--"
"You hold on, bucko," McCoy restrained him easily with one hand, a bad
sign in itself. "You're in no shape to go anywhere."
Jim seemed to have little ammunition for an argument. He sank
down on the mattress. "Fine, Bones, you go; just find out what the hell
is going on here."
McCoy scurried out and after the three Vulcans just before the door
"Your presence is not required," Stipek said, continuing their march
"Yeah, well, I'm coming anyway," McCoy rallied and picked up his
pace. They continued through corridor after twisting corridor
until they came to a sealed door, unusual itself on Vulcan.
One Vulcan keyed a complex sequence on the door panel. The
fingered his robe absently. The door swung open.
to step through. A transporter activated taking the three
in a beam of yellow and leaving McCoy standing alone in an empty
Back in the isolation room the interrogation continued in the form of
"We find it interesting that you have no injuries from your struggle
with the wy-dygu."
"As do I," Spock replied. "I do not recall much of the
event. It is possible I applied the neck pinch immediately."
"And yet Kirk's tissue was found under your finger nails and in your
Spock looked at his hands where dark matter lined the nails.
was dark. He was already bleeding. He was in a
battle with the beast himself. This is to be expected."
"Your semen was found on Kirk's body."
"I was in pon farr an wrestling a beast on his back. This,
also, is not a surprise," said Spock.
"We have had the area where you were rescued re-examined. We
no trace of wy-dygu, or any reptilian DNA, anywhere in the vicinity."
Spock met their eyes flatly. "You do not believe that there
was a wy-dygu."
Sktam answered precisely, "The mind cannot be trusted in the madness of
the plak-tow. What is may not be, and what is not may
So has it been from the time of our forefathers. This too, is
"My captain heard it as well. He saw the animal on the cliffs
and felt it as it threw itself on him."
"Your DNA was isolated from Kirk's rectum."
Spock drew in his breath and fell backwards to the bench. In
instant it all came tumbling down upon him, almost drowning him in the
flood. A mirage. Echoes. Folie
deux. How very powerful the mind, no, the minds,
when they wanted something so very, very much.
Spock's voice came as if dragged against his will from a very great
distance. His vision turned inward and his face bore a queer
expression, puzzled and yet more certain than he had been of anything
for a very long time. He resolved, with the tone of a man speaking more
to himself than aloud, "I am the beast."
Neither Vulcan responded.
Spock pressed his hands hard together and collected his remaining
thoughts. It was not so difficult. There was only
"Have you told him?" he asked.
Stipek answered with a shake of his head. "We are of the
that there is nothing to tell. Captain Kirk believes he was
violently mauled by an ancient beast--one unknown to the outside
world--despite the best efforts of his First Officer to keep him from
harm. We believe that he is correct. "
Sktam added, "We see no reason to further expose the secrets of
Vulcan. We believe the caves are safe and that you and your
captain are safe."
Spock stared at his hands, which had served him so well for so many
years. He watched as his traitorous blood coursed through the
distended veins under his skin. It trailed from the tips,
the damming evidence clotted brown under the ragged edges of his nails
and thick and fast, picking up speed all the way, to his
He studied the little wrinkles in the overlying skin--how fines line
ran into thicker in the same way that earlier years ran into later--and
Spock wondered for how many more years he would allow this travesty of
their natures to continue.
He closed his eyes and cast his mind back over three thousand years of
post-reform Vulcan philosophy. He set the machinery of his
upon the task of finding the one tenet that would allow him to return
to that bedside and meet the unconditional trust in those liquid hazel
eyes with anything less than absolute honesty. No
was delivered and, for the first time in his life, Spock considered
that the equations of Vulcan might not hold all the truths that exist
in the universe.
Spock shook his head in resignation. "Perhaps that is sufficient for
Vulcan mores, but it will not do for me."
He stood and straightened, hands behind his back. True to the manner of
his people, his face showed nothing at all. "May I go to him now?"
"Of course. When you are ready."
"I believe I said, 'now'."
One looked at the other. One pressed an icon on his robe, a
transporter hummed, and they all materialized back in the anteroom.
The two robed Vulcans stayed at the window. Spock pushed
the door and this time Kirk did roll to a sit. The sheet
over his lap and his face screwed in concentration as he
He supported himself with his hands braced against the edge of the bed
as he spoke. "Spock."
Spock's crisp voice filtered through the crack just before the door
swung closed. "Captain, I have uncovered some new information that
impacts us both. It may alter our relationship considerably.
must speak with you."
Spock approached him, lips moving in mechanical precision.
Through the glass the Vulcans watched. They couldn't hear a
but Kirk's face clouded, then cleared and broke, telling the most
amazing tale with nary a word. When Spock's lips finally
for a moment all was still. Then Spock moved toward him as if
say something else, but Jim shook his head firmly and stopped him with
an upraised palm. Jim drew his other hand roughly across his
face. His lips and tongue moved briefly, any words muted to
outside world by the thick pane of intervening glass. Then
smiled and extended just two fingers. Spock reached back in
Expressionless, the Vulcans turned away from the window.
TREK TOS |
BLOOPER ROOM | STAR
FICTION | SHERLOCK